Relationship coaching helps couples reflect and take intentional action to create relationships filled with happiness, connection, and shared vision. It is a little different from couples counseling, only in that it is very forward thinking, positive, and action-oriented. I blend counseling and coaching in my work
There are many reasons couples decide to start working with me. Here are ten of the most common:
1. Sweethearts considering marriage.
Pre-marital counseling and coaching is some of my favorite work. You know you want to be together, now, the question is, HOW do you want to be together? What kind of future do you want to build? How will you navigate life changes with grace? Working with a relationship coach can help you get clear about the life you want to build as a committed couple.
2. Keeping the relationship fulfilling long term.
You have probably heard me say it already, every relationship needs a tune up from time to time. Keeping your relationship a priority amid the many responsibilities and obligations that come up can be difficult. It's not uncommon to lose a little luster over time. Couples coaching can help provide time to re-assess how to sustainably keep the home fires burning for a long long time.
3. Getting back together after taking a break.
Little known fact: LOTS of couples break up and get back together. When you are deciding to return to partnership it can be really helpful to work with a relationship coach to both repair any gaps from your break, and work on forgiveness. Your relationship coach will also help you determine how you want to move forward together.
4. Thinking about becoming parents.
Parenting is an amazing journey, but it isn't for everyone and co-parenting doesn't come naturally. Who do you want to be as a parent? Is parenting something you both really want? When you and your partner are ready to start thinking about a family it can be a good time to bring in a coach as a facilitator to help guide you through the decision-making and planning processes.
5. Starting a business with your life partner.
So we know you and your partner have great ideas and can manage projects together well (that home remodel looks beautiful!) but are you ready to start a business together? And if you are, how will you maintain your relationship strength as your business dreams come true? Contact a relationship coach to help you as a consultant for your business partnership when it's also our romance partner!
6. Opening your relationship to non-monogamy.
Polyamory and open relationships are much more common than people think. However, because we have strong cultural taboos around talking about open relationships, most couples are without support as they begin conversations about openness. You can find poly-friendly relationship coaches and couples or marriage counselors in the national Poly-friendly Professionals or the Open List. You can find me there too!
7. Adventuring in new sexual or sensual territory.
Dan Savage coined the phrase GGG meaning one should strive to be good in bed, giving "equal time and equal pleasure" to one's partner, and game "for anything—within reason."for things sexually and sensually. For some people meeting this GGG standard is not easily done. Working with a relationship coach or couples counselor could help you and your partner explore new sensual connections and be even stronger together in the bedroom (and wherever else these adventures take you). Check the Kink-Aware Professionals national listing for a sex-positive (non-judgmental) provider near you.
8. Repairing a relationship after an affair.
An affair doesn't necessarily mean you have to end your relationship. Many couples decide to stay together. However, repairing from a violation of trust can require professional support. Contact a relationship counselor or couples coach to help you rebuild connection and trust and decide if staying together is the best option for you.
9. Re-imagining the relationship after things go blah.
Lets face it, relationships take work and it is not easy to razzle-dazzle your partner every day (nor is it a realistic expectation). Work with a relationship coach or couples counselor to help reignite that spark and fascination that brought you together in the first place.
10. Deciding to move in together.
I have worked with many couples deciding if and when to move in together. Many people struggle with questions of balance privacy, space, and independence during these conversations. It can be very helpful to have a neutral party's support and guidance as you transition to or from living together.
The bottom line is, if you are going to stay together for a long time, you are going to weather many changes to your life and relationship. Relationship coaching is like a vitamin boost for your relationship's health during times of stress and transition. Why not give it a try?